Having a Saturn Moment

In August 2007, Pluto entered my Fifth House.

I was in the middle of a massive transition. One year out of undergrad and I was ready to burn the bridge behind my first failed attempt at adulthood. I left a job I hated, a city I hated, mourned a relationship that had been Fool’s Gold, pushed through a nearly crippling depressive spell. It was time for better things. A better job title and a higher salary in Cleveland, where the comforts of home and my core friend group would cushion the unrelenting blows of adulthood.

Also. I started a blog.

Prior to blogging, I used Facebook Notes to air my delights and grievances and had developed a decent following among my friends and followers. Anyone who knew me knew I had plenty to say. I wanted someplace new to say it. My own little corner of the internet, where I could strip bare under a screen name. Confessions of a Skinny Black Girl was born.

I didn’t know about astrology beyond my sun sign at the time. But looking back. “Skinny Black Girl” was my Pluto in the Fifth House moment.

A Pluto transit through the Fifth House looks like this:

Becoming established as a creative person. Turning a pastime into your field of expertise. Rediscovering play and the pure joy of being alive. The legacy of childhood, and the power of what’s passed on to children. Finding your unique self-expression, and a tangible medium to bring it out. The intensity of performance, sports and shining in a leadership role. Enjoyment becomes a revitalizing force in your life. The power of the heart, and momentum from being heart-led.” 

Skinny Black Girl was my unique self-expression and the tangible medium I used to bring it out.

A year later, I adopted an additional medium, Twitter. Cementing “Skinny Black Girl” as not just a blog handle, but an identity of sorts.

The rest, as they say, is history.

Now, my Fifth House–the area of the natal chart that represents play and creativity–is experiencing a Saturn transit. Where Pluto is like a super charge of obsessive energy and power, Saturn is a task master. Saturn wants to check Pluto’s work so far. Wants to address area of excess, the usefulness of one’s habits. Born under a Scorpio Moon, I am especially susceptible to Pluto’s darker impulses; namely compulsive patterns. As Saturn knocks on the door of my Fifth House, lingering doubts about my creative mediums are at the forefront of my mind.

What parts of Skinny Black Girl aren’t working anymore? Saturn asks.

Twitter damn sure isn’t.

But what else?

What happens to my blog when I can’t rely on my Twitter repartee to attract followers? Or if net neutrality goes away and splinters the “free” internet as we know it?

What happens to this stage–Skinny Black Girl–when it no longer has an audience? How will I write and create then?

I guess we’ll find out.


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