I’m trying to save this space for actual writing and use social media to randomly spout off. Then I remember I pay the bills in this motherfucker.
It’s finally spring in Cleveland. Which is actually pre-summer, because Lake Erie is like “Fuck is a spring? Snow or 80 degrees. Take your pick.” The first 80-degree day last week felt like a reunion with an old lover. The sun kissed my bare shoulders and sent breezy caresses down my legs like it was reacquainting itself with my body. I’m hoping the sunshine and being outdoors will make me less of a raging bitch who hates everything. I look forward to dresses and drinks and tuning up my rusty flirting skills. Also people skills. Because, raging bitch who hates everything.
Today, I will vote in the Ohio primaries. I pray to whichever god will listen that Dennis Kucinich (the guy who presided over Cleveland’s city government defaulting on a $15.5M debt) isn’t the Democratic nominee for governor at the end of the night. His candidacy represents the “this person says things that feel good so who cares if he’s qualified” problem in politics. Which means he probably WILL get the nomination and I’ll think more frequently about how much I enjoyed Montreal last month.
I have not watched the Donald Glover video yet. Every still I’ve seen violates my sense of male aesthetics. Good for him pushing boundaries. If that’s what he did.
I avoided the Fenty Beauty craze (#TeamDrugstoreLippiesAndMascara), but that damned Savage X lingerie? So I can sing “Needed Me” in my head whenever I wear it? R.I.P. to my budget. I hardly knew thee.
Speaking of lingerie, I’ve accepted that my 30something body is both skinny and fluffy. I am not your body goals, but I know how to dress this body and no one who sees me naked is turning me away. So.
After five months of on-and-off reading, I finally finished 1984. Calling it “enjoyable” is a stretch, but I was intrigued enough after a certain point to push through. Having that “Ooooh. So I can still read complete books! What can I finish next?” high. I’m thinking I’ll complete Macbeth: the Novel. It felt pretty Game of Thrones-ish from what I recall. And we know GoT is my jam.
The Toronto Raptors have to be tired of running up to get done up every year. Can the NBA just ban them from the playoffs, no matter where they seed? Bump up a hungry ninth seed with some heart instead? Shit.
I heard the following in the Schopenhauer episode of Philosophize This!:
I think the key thing about love he’d want people to realize preferably as early in life as possible…is that we often sit around thinking about how our lives are going to play out…we know that we want to be happy…and we often mistakenly conflate falling in love and being a happy person. We often think that there is some sort of direct connection between the two. Schopenhauer wanted us to realize that the process of falling in love and the process of being a happy person are COMPLETELY separate from each other. You can be happy without love and you can love someone without being happy.
To quote the kids, I feel seen.
On a similar note, for the right gentleman, this song could be my summer mood: