Stand in the Sun

This morning, I read Bre Writes “Isle of Misfit Posts,” which linked to a post about blogging just to blog which linked to another post about reviving personal blogs to tell our individual human stories. You all know I’ve felt a similar calling on and off over the last few years, but my answers to it have waxed and waned. Why don’t I stick with it? Fears about privacy. A rusty pen. A life that folded inward and is distrustful of anything outside its own ecosystem.

But.

I read the posts and I smiled through each; felt the old call to put fingers to keyboard for the joy of words. Maybe the time to cultivate a community around my little corner of the internet has passed and The Skinny Black Girl is just me, shouting into the void.

***

“How’s writing going?” my friend Ashleigh asked a couple weeks ago. “It’s not,” I text back. “I haven’t done enough living lately to have anything to say. I’m taking some time to live a little.”

The thing is: I need sunlight.

My little cave is warm, but it is dark. It is a place for retreat. Nothing grows here.

***

Did I ever tell you I’m a sun god? Seriously. With a rising sign in Leo, here is what my life should be:

 People with this rising sign need to say ‘yes’ to life, to trust others, to trust themselves, and to trust God if that lies within their belief system. This Leonine attitude of acceptance, joy, and generosity of spirit is far easier to maintain if this Ascendant ‘imitates God’ by being creative and being appreciated for it. [1]

A sun god who lives in a cave. Imagine that.

***

If there’s anything in the world I can say “yes” to, it’s personal blogging. Blogging taught me how to shine a light on my dark spaces instead of drowning in them. Taught me to trust the process of a routine practice. The Skinny Black Girl, at its best, is where I stand in the sun. And if in the crowded Internet landscape of 2018, it’s just a void, I want to bathe it in light anyway. So here I am. Back.

I mean BACK back.

[Current Soundtrack: “All That I Can Say” x Gretchen Paralto]

  1. Forrest, Jodie. “Chapter Twelve: The Ascendant Cookbook. Ascendant in Leo.” The Ascendant. Your Rising Sign. Borrego Springs, CA: Seven Paws Press, Inc., 2007. Ebook.

Featured Photo by Orlova Maria on Unsplash

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